The problem: My child has a messy bedroom.
Inspire your child.
Do: Look through magazines or on Pinterest to see what kinds of rooms your child feels drawn to. Notice a variety of environments you’re in and talk about what you like about how the space is organized and how it feels.
Model caring about your personal space.
Do:
Designate times of the week when everyone in the house is working on fixing up their own space. Be generous with helping one another.
Make it fun. Have a “white glove inspector” scheduled to come for a visit… And turn it into a Cinderella game or sing “It’s The Hard-Knock Life” from Annie or “A spoonful of sugar” from Mary Poppins.
Don’t assume they know how to clean their room.
Don’t forget your child’s age. Early grade schoolers should be able to put away toys and clothes, but they may not have the tools to tackle a messy bedroom by themselves. Late elementary schoolers should be able to clean their bedroom, but if they’ve never been taught, step by step, they may need structured and supportive guidance. It helps when everything has a place.
Raise your child’s clean consciousness.
Say:
- “Are there any good ideas from your classroom that we could borrow?”
- “How does your teacher organize and keep things clean?”
Compare and you will despair.
Don’t say: “This room is a pig’s sty! It’s disgusting! Why aren’t you more like Brenda?”
Why this approach to a messy bedroom matters
Keeping your personal space clean is all a part of what scientists call “executive function“, which is essential to advanced thinking and organizing. Most kids need to learn these skills first, and then they need structure to turn the skills into habits.
That said, your children are individuals. Depending on their personalities, they may prefer cleaner or messier spaces. Research suggests clean, spare spaces instill tranquility, but messy ones inspire creativity.
